I just got pulled over by Ryan Phillipe. Fortunately, Peter Stormare was not riding in the passenger seat and I did not have any extra $100 bills hanging out of my wallet. And, although it crossed my mind, I did not lead him on a car chase that would lead us through the closest mall.
I hate that helpless feeling of knowing they are right to pull me over. Why can't I get defensive and tell the cop boy that he should be out there catching the real criminals? Oh, I guess I was breaking the law so I am the real criminal. I hate that expression anyway. Real criminals. They have to start somewhere. And this was a very young kid. It almost looked like I was his first ticket. He was excited!
We live in an area where there are still a lot of farms, so it is really lame to have these 25 mph roads where horses should be galloping instead of cars driving. So, it angers me that a cop set up in someone's pasture and waited for unsuspecting soccer players to go zooming by. Too fast? 42 in the rural west?
One day I will have to fight a ticket. Go into the judge and come up with all these strange and elaborate excuses. I don't think I could ever win though. I don't have the face for it.
a. I am not female.
b. I have that naturally pissed off look that people cannot wait to get angry at.
c. I don't think quick on my feet.
If I could bring in my laptop and type out my responses and have that go straight to the judge in some IVR kind of way, then maybe I could win. Somehow my own non-written voice does not work as well. I wonder if Biden is a good writer.
