I Know a Worse One

I have been banned from the bedroom because of a bad habit.  I can only do this when I am 25 feet away from the house.  I have tried sneaking into the bathroom, shutting the door and turning on the fan, but somehow, my wife knows.

I feel like I am a leper or something.  It's not even really a habit.  It's just the way I do it.  Everyone does this simple act.  But mine is just a little louder than others.

I have tried to quiet it down, but I feel like I am not getting it all.

What am I to do?  Is there a doctor for this condition? 

I am not sure at what point I started blowing my nose wrong.  I do it really loud and my parents think I am going to damage my ears.  My wife thinks I am going to damage her ears.  I know it is like honking a really loud horn.